White knight fever

Sometimes, it's just a cigar

The excellent ’50 Shades is Domestic Abuse’ blog have published the first two of their letters to Christian and Ana.The letter to Ana is heartfelt and troubling; the letter to Christian is a reminder of something I like to call the tyranny of if. If only Christian had not had his difficult childhood, would he be a different man? As my mother would say, if wishes were horses beggars would ride. There is only one way Christian can be a different man – by choosing to do so. Understanding the past can be helpful, but understanding the shadow the past casts on the present is more helpful.

Understanding your relationship to someone else demands insight and a willingness to embrace your own weaknesses as well as your strengths. For Christian, it means learning that a desire to be the white knight who transforms someone else’s life does not bring…

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